S E R V I C E B E F O R E S E L F | 147 long hours in the back office, I never asked him how things were going. I never inquired about his family or his personal life or if he had any health issues that were concerning him. Why was he spending so much time at work and never taking lunch? Why was he smoking two packs a day and putting on weight? Was there something going on that I wasn't aware of? Instead of really connecting with him like a true wing- man, I barked orders at him and never really thought about what I could do to help him deal with his issues. I did the easy thing: I put him on probation and stuck him on a fitness program. I expected him to serve me, but I never served him. I was his boss, but I wasn't his wingman. THE MISSION OF SERVICE What I learned that day was that to make a difference as a wingman, you have to go above and beyond. I wasn't doing enough. To me, the mission was about getting the job done in the life support shop. It was not about the people. Sergeant Sum- mers had a mission, but I didn't know about it, because I never asked. I needed him, and so did the squadron, but he had another mission. He had a life outside that life support shop. Watching him in his hospital bed that day, I realized that his mission, now more than ever, was his wife and kids who stood by his side. "Service before self" is one of three core values of the Air Force. They are called the armed services for a reason. And service always involves sacrifice in some way. It means giving something. When people are in trouble or experiencing a challenge in life, they may not have the courage to ask for help. They may