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Relationship Rules > Contentment is a high aim - Pg. 128

Contentment is a high aim RULE 61 You know that feeling you get when you first fall in love? Weak at the knees, stomach churning, can't think about anything else? It's great, isn't it? On the other hand, it puts you on an emotional knife-edge that makes almost everything else, from work to eating, really quite difficult. Some people get addicted to it. They just don't feel alive unless they're `in love'. But of course relationships don't stay like that. Sooner or later you become confident and sure enough of your partner not to worry or fret, and you get used to having them around so you don't jump at the sound of the phone. So if you're addicted to falling `in love', you'll have to keep ditching your partners and finding new people to fall for. You may be wondering why I keep putting inverted commas round `in love'. Well, there are two reasons. The first is that you don't have to be in love to have this feeling, and you may be misled. It might actually be lust or infatuation and not love at all. And the other reason is that I don't want to imply that if you don't have this feeling you aren't in love with your partner. There are very good reasons why this heightened emotional state doesn't last forever. You couldn't function, and the state has a lot to do with nerves and excitement and after a while your rela- tionship will inevitably stop making you nervous, and cease to be as exciting as it was. You can still do exciting things together, but the relationship itself will become routine, hopefully in the very best of ways. T H E R U L E S O F LO V E 128