190 Developing Mental Toughness The what-ifs: some tips The self-confidence and mental toughness of the coach are important fac- tors in the coaching relationship. The coach's confidence in his or her abil- ity to support another person can be sensed by coachees and can influence how they perceive the likelihood of success. From this point of view, it is helpful if coaches enter these conversations optimistic about the interac- tion and free of self-doubt or concern. In reality, that is probably close to impossible for any coach, and especially for coaches who are relatively inexperienced. The good news is that the more one coaches, the more belief one seems to have in the process and in one's own abilities as a coach. First, it is help- ful to remember that most people feel valued when they are listened to in a genuine and authentic way (Kline, 1999). Secondly, the non-directive ap- proach that underpins coaching for mental toughness means that you, as a coach, do not need to `have the answers' or `own the problem', leaving you free to be present and support the coachees as they come to their own solu- tions. Thirdly, the model above can be shared with coachees so that they are aware of the way the conversation might develop with the support of an attentive coach.