Woody's Performance Review--What's Inline Next for pH Control? Through some existential twist of fate, Woody Allen finds himself somewhere in the seven hidden dimensions of the eleven dimen- sional universe where he is assigned the task of commissioning pH systems. We join Woody at the end of the year during his perfor- mance review with his supervisor, Mr. Bossman. Woody: What is all this stuff on your desk? Is this a swap meet or something? Bossman: Sit down, Woody, and tell me what you think of pH loops. Woody: I feel pH loops are divided up into the horrible and the miserable. The horrible ones are the ones with the steep titration curves and all the others are the miserable ones. If they are installed on a sump they are worse than death. Anyone who has spent an evening with an insurance salesperson knows what death is like. Bossman: I heard you refused to start up a sump pH loop. 105