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A New Life > We're a Family Now Your new life together

We're a Family Now Your new life together

Q: I was in foster care when I was little. I can't believe I'm part of a family now. How will I adapt?
A: The whole process of having a baby can bring up many emotions and cause us to re-evaluate our lives and upbringing. Most parents, whatever their backgrounds, want a good life and opportunities for their own children. Your childhood experiences have shaped you as a person and will obviously influence how you feel about having a child of your own and extending your own family. Be honest and explore your feelings and expectations with your partner, and maybe with your midwife and doctor, while you adapt to your new life. It is important to try and maintain a healthy perspective on family life and although you are bound to want to be a superb parent, don't be too hard on yourself or have unrealistic expectations. You could consider looking into parenting courses since these may help you increase your confidence and be comfortable with your new role, and contact with other parents can be mutually beneficial for you and your baby. Above all, try to enjoy your time with your baby rather than spending time worrying.

Q: I'm in my pajamas all day and haven't got on top of housework since the birth two weeks ago.
A: After the initial excitement of the birth and bringing your baby home, the reality and exhaustion can start to take their toll. By two weeks, many partners have returned to work, visitors are waning, and life with a baby can seem relentless. Indeed, you may find that the weeks and months after your baby is born are not the happy time you expected. It can help to create a focus for each day, such as visiting a friend, grocery shopping, or walking to the park, so that you have a goal to motivate you to get ready. Many mothers find that they have to get dressed as soon as they get up or it can be too difficult to find time to dress later in the day. You could make use of the time before your partner goes to work to have a moment to yourself to shower and get dressed.

If you are really finding it hard to motivate yourself and are feeling tired, confused, and unable to cope, you may be suffering from postpartum depression (see section I'm feeling so depressed) and should talk to your midwife or doctor.


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