151 Quick Ideas to Improve Your People Skills form of false light, then you're developing a false reality. In time, you'll be found out. Assignment Think about times when you've felt as though you needed to appear as more than you are. How did you feel about your- self? Did it take a lot of energy to keep up the pretense? Then think about the times when you were able to be completely honest about who you are. Did you feel stronger, more coura- geous, and honest? Give these two situations some thought, and then look for ways to live up to who you really are. Real relationships are based on the reality of our true charac- ter, values, principles, strengths, and weaknesses. In other words, "putting it out there." When we own who we are with modesty and honesty, we can actually relax and begin to feel safe in the fact that people who like us, genuinely like us just the way we are.